I slept and I saw her again, radiant and glowing as usual. We played, we laughed, we cuddled and I felt warm again. I had missed the feeling.
Then we spoke, voice like silk, Jerusalem bells ringing…the sound of innocence, though slightly tempered by experience, yet beautiful in the state.
I wonder why maturity should demand such a price, sacrifices like this should be by choice, not forced and leaving me with occasional sadness.
Innocence is not the only thing we lose to maturity, I have realised. It’s strange you may think, but I say that as much as we think that our faith grows as we get older, I have begun to see that it isn’t particularly so. I now have ideas as to why babies can’t speak (forget that baby language gist, even they don’t understand each other). I think that their innocence coupled with such level of faith has the most effectual capacity. And since that power cannot be taken away from them, access to it has to be limited somehow.
Ideally, babies ought to grow up with an understanding of the power they possess, but sadly the world is evil and has NOT the conducive environment to facilitate such growth; and just as muscles atrophy due to lack of use, so does our faith and power diminish as we grow older on this earth. So that in truth, our real journey in life is not the forward march we think it to be; the real journey is in reverse, back to the source which is God. Have you ever wondered why lots of the most powerful words are ‘RE‘ words? REpent, REvelation, REdeem, REalise, REvolution to mention a few.
How we measure progress is not the same as God does. He is concerned about how much we know him and understand his will for us. I told Sunshine once that my most cherished possession is my faith. No, I do not claim to have full level of faith, but I hold fast to the level that I have, and hope that as I make my way back to the source, my faith will yield to the touch of heaven’s purest light, and be activated to higher levels.
This much I know and believe to be true, that only the journey is written, not the destination. It is by choice to enjoy the journey as much as the destination.
I woke and Sunshine wasn’t beside me. My smile vanished.